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::butter::
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::sandwiches::
::the past::
!!SHOUT!! Baby: booboo, why I always can't tag?? I shall have my own tagboard here then. haha.. |
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:: dream a little dream ::
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what to say? i really dunno what to say. too many things happen at the same time... - at 11:56 PM Artist: John Denver Album: Greatest Hits No. 3 Title: Perhaps Love perhaps love is like a resting place A shelter from the storm It exists to give you comfort It is there to keep you warm And in those times of trouble When you are most alone The memory of love will bring you home Perhaps love is like a window Perhaps an open door It invites you to come closer ( you wrote close) It wants to show you more And even if you lose yourself And don`t know what to do The memory of love will see you through Oh, love to some is like a cloud To some as strong as steel For some a way of living For some a way to feel And some say love is holding on And some say letting go And some say love is everything And some say they don`t know Perhaps love is like the ocean Full of conflict, full of pain (you wrote - change) Like a fire when it`s cold outside Or thunder when it rains If i should live forever And all my dreams come true My memories of love will be of you Words and music by john denver - at 9:10 PM Artist: Delta Goodrem Album: Innocent Eyes Title: Lost Without You I know I can be a little stubborn sometimes A little righteous and too proud I just want to find a way to compromise Cos I believe that we can work things out I thought I had all the answers never giving in But baby since you've gone I admit that I was wrong All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm lost without you I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you How my ever gonna get rid of these blues Baby I'm so lonely all the time Everywhere I go I get so confused You're the only thing that's on my mind Oh my beds so cold at night and I miss you more each day Only you can make it right no I'm not too proud to say All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm lost without you I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you If I could only hold you now and make the pain just go away Can't stop the tears from running down my face Oh All I know is I'm lost without you I'm not gonna lie How my going to be strong without you I need you by my side If we ever say we'll never be together and we ended with goodbye don't know what I'd do ...I'm lost without you I keep trying to find my way but all I know is I'm lost without you I keep trying to face the day I'm lost without you - at 9:05 PM aries your kisses are quick and passionate fits of lustful pleasure that are there and then gone. taurus your kisses linger: they are deliberate, heartfelt and they can go on and on and on. gemini your kisses are interrupted by spasms of giggles, smiles and funny observations. cancer your kisses are warm and tender, and you never want to let them go. leo your kisses are wild and uninhibited, biting and clawing: you except applause for your perfomance. virgo your kisses are so subtle and tidy, your lover only notices them once you've finished. libra you're too busy worrying about your breath to really get into your kisses. scorpio you skip the kiss and get straight to whatever comes next for you. sagittarius your kisses are surprising, spontaneous affairs that leave the kissed wanting more. capricon your kisses are intense moments of sublime relief from the stress of your day. aquarius your kisses are wet and messy, and you tend yo keep your eyes open. pisces your kisses are starry-eyed, amourous and long-lasting. - at 1:48 PM been sneezing none stop since this morning... yao shen bing le...anyway, think today's problem will be alot of fun.. i think.. but its on plagarism.. yuckz... change of facilitator.. friday! the day for me to enjoy. the module for today.. tada! CULTURE AND COMMUNICATION... WEEeeeeee!!! *jump* k, wad i'm gonna do for today... write a poem.. on? lol.. my grp choose "internet are just downloading MP3 and porn"... citation.. plagarism, etc... blah blah blah.. got to finish our work b4 12... go for elim chew's talk.. lets see how she can inspire us.. or me... Omg... just cant stand the smell... idiot lah.. just talked about that issue yesternight.. must be some curse lah. arrgh.. y cant he just put on his sandals.. instead of taking em out and putting his whole feet on the carpet.. HELP!! axe oil is of no use...wanna puke liao.... - at 9:37 AM ok, got this from an email. from JH.... it's really... kinda sadded by it also. Tree === The reason I'm called tree is because I'm good at painting trees. Overtime I start to use a tree on the right hand corner as a trademark for all my watercolors painting. I have dated 5 gals when I was in Pre-U. There's one gal who I love a lot but never dare go after her. She doesn't have a pretty face, doesn't have a good figure, doesn't have outstanding charm. She is just a very ordinary gal. I like her. I really like her. Like her innocent, like her frankness. Like her cuteness, like her intelligence and her fragility. Reason for not going after her is because I felt somebody so ordinary like her is not a good match for me. I'm also afraid that after we are together all the good feelings will vanish. I'm also afraid other's gossips will hurt her. I felt that if she's my gal, she will be mine ultimately & I don't have to give up everything just for her. The last reason, made her accompany me for 3 years. She watch me chase after gals, and I have make her heart cry for 3 years. She wants to be a good actress and I'm a very demanding director. When I kissed my 2nd girlfriend, she bumped into us. She was embarrassed but smile & say "Go on!" before running off. The next day, her eyes was swollen like a walnut. I purposely didn't want to think about what causes her to cry but laugh at her the whole day. When everybody go back home, she was alone crying in the classroom. She didn't know that I returned from soccer training to get something. I watch her cry for an hour or so. My 4th girlfriend didn't like her. There was once when both of them quarreled. I know that based on her character she's not the type that will start off the quarrel. But I still sided with my girlfriend. I shouted at her and her eyes was filled shocked. I didn't care about her feelings and walked off with my girlfriend. The next day, she still laugh & joke with me like nothing has ever happened. I know that she's very hurt but she didn't know that my heart ache is as bad as hers. When I broke up with my 5th girlfriend, I asked her out. After going out for a day, I told her that I have something to tell her. She told me that coincidentally, she has something to tell me too. I told her about my break up and she told me about her getting together. I know whose the guy. He has been going after her for quite a while. A very cute guy full of energy, lively and interesting. His pursuit for her has been the talk of the school. I can't show her my heart ache but could only smile & congratulate her. When I reach home, the heart ache is so strong that I can't stand it. It's like a heavy weighted stone on my chest. I couldn't breath. Wanted to shout but can't. Tears rolled down & I broke down & cry. How many times have I seen her cry for the man that doesn't acknowledge her presence too. During graduation, I read a sms in my hp. It was send 10 days ago when I broke down and cry. I haven't read it since then. It says "Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay" Leaf === During Pre-U days, I like to collect leaves. Why? Because I felt that for a leaf to leave the tree she has been relying on for so long it takes a lot of courage. During the 3 years of Pre-U I was on very close terms with a guy. Not BGR kind but as buddy kind. But when he had his 1st girlfriend, I learnt a feeling I never should have learnt - Jealousy. The sourness in the heart can't be describe by using a lemon. It's like 100 rotten sour lemon. Sourness to the extreme limit. They were only together for 2 mths. When they broke up, I hide my strong sense of happiness. But after a mth, he got together with another gal. I like him & I know he like me. But why won't he pursue me? Since he love me why he doesn't want to make the first move? Whenever he had a new girlfriend, my heart would hurt. Time after time, my heart was hurt. I begin to suspect that this is a one sided love. If he don't like he, why does he treat me so well. It's beyond what you will normally do for a friend. Liking a person is very heart wrenching. I can know his likes, his habits. But his feelings towards me I can never figure out. You can't expect me a gal to ask him right? Despite that, I still want to be by his side. Care for him, accompany him, love him. Hoping that one fine day, he will come & love me. It's like waiting for his phone call every night, wanting him to send me sms. I know that no matter how busy he is, he will make time for me. Because of this, I waited for him. The 3 years were the hardest to go through & I really want to give up. Sometimes, I wonder should I continue waiting. The pain and hurt, the dilemma accompany me for 3 years. Till the end of my 3rd year, a 2nd year junior begins to go after me. Everyday he pursuit me relentlessly. From outright rejection to a point in time when I felt that I'm willing to let him have a small footing in my heart. He's like a warm & gentle wind, trying to blow a leaf away from the tree. In the end, I realized that I didn't want to give this wind a small footing in my heart. I know this wind will bring this badly battered leave far away & better land. Finally I left tree, but the tree only smile & didn't ask me to stay. Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay Wind ==== Because I like a gal called leaf. Because she's so dependent on tree so I have to be a gust wind. A wind that will blow her away. When I first met her, it was 1 mth after I transfer to the new school. I saw a petite person looking at my seniors & me playing soccer. During ECA time, she will always be sitting there. Be it alone or with her friends looking at him. When he talks with gals there's jealousy in her eyes. When he looked at her, there's a smile in her eyes. Looking at her became my habit. Just like she likes to look at him. One day, she didn't appear. I felt something amissed. I can't explain the feeling except it's a kind of uneasiness. The senior was also not there as well. I went to their classroom, hid outside and saw my senior scolding her. Tears were in her eyes while he left. The next day, I saw her at her usual place, looking at him. I walked over and smiled to her. Took out a note & gave to her. She was surprised. She looked at me, smiled & accept the note. The next day, she appeared & pass me a note and left. Leaf's heart is too heavy and wind couldn't blow her away It's not that leaf heart is too heavy. It because leaf never want to leave tree I replied her note with this statement and slowly she started to talk to me & accept my presents & phone calls. I know that the person she loves is not me. But I have this perseverance that one day I will make her like me. Within 4 mths, I have declared my love for her no less than 20 times. Every time, she will divert away from the topic. But I never give up. If I decide I want her to be mine, I will definitely use all means to win her over. I can't remember how many times I have declared my love to her. Although I know she will try to divert but I still bear a small ray of hope. Hoping that she will agree to me my girlfriend. I didn't hear any reply from her over the phone. I asked "what are you doing? How come you didn't want to reply?" She said, "I'm nodding my head". "Ah?" I couldn't believe my ears. "I'm nodding my head" She replied loudly. I hang up the phone, quickly changed and took a taxi and rush to her place & press her door bell. During the moment when she opens the door. I hugged her tightly. Leaf departure is because of Wind pursuit? Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay? - at 9:33 PM include some pachelbel's canon in d midi in my site... have many diff version.. too much... so i just picked a few.... i had a horrible night.. i mean last night. dam shit lah. one can actually be so insistent, persistent and so dam patient...like real.. siao lahz... just wanna walk away from the toubles in my life, wanna find a better day. craig david's 'walking away'...things you say are driving me away. - at 4:49 PM march 22, 1986 3 + 22 + 1986 = 2011 = 2 + 1 + 1 = 4 # 4 - THE CONSERVATIVE 4's are sensible and traditional. They like order and routine. They only act when they fully understand what they are expected to do. They like getting their hands dirty and working hard. They are attracted to the outdoors and feel an affinity with nature. They are prepared to wait and can be stubborn and persistent. They should learn to be more flexible and to be nice to themselves. Famous 4's: Neil Diamond, Margaret Thatcher, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Tina Turner, Paul Hogan, Oprah Winfrey - at 12:19 PM  - at 5:08 PM from CK's diary (without his permission)...wallet? male? female? Someone said,"Wallets are a lot like girls. You really have to take good care of, because if you won't, something might happen..." I know what he means. I just lost a wallet, and I just lost a girl. You know, it's the exact same thing. One day, you just realize it's gone. You try to look for it everywhere, even going back to the places where you could have lost it. You think, and you think hard, only to come upon a grim realization: it's really gone. Of course, you can hold on to some hope. After all, there have been some very, very lucky (blessed?) people who get it back. Perhaps you could become one of those people. You sit home and you hope that someone would call, and that you would get it back. But then, some time passes, and you realize that it's still gone, and you realize that it's time to let go. The first few days, you turn to your friends for support. Some tell you you'll be ok, some tell you that it was your fault and that you should have been more careful, and some tell you about their own experiences. They give you all sorts of advice, none you haven't heard before. You then go out to find a new wallet, only to realize that you don't really want a new one. You want the old one that you lost. No, you don't want all these better-looking wallets, you want yours, because of how comfortable it is, because of all the cards and pictures and other stuff in it. You go out and carry on without a wallet, keeping your money in your pocket instead. You throw away stuff that you would have held on to if you had your old wallet. And then, finally, you find a new wallet you like and settle in. You then start filling your new wallet, little by little. It still doesn't feel as comfortable as the old one, but it's getting there. Then you start putting in cards and pictures and other important stuff in the wallet. Soon enough, there's as much stuff in your new wallet as the old one. And then, after some time, you feel as comfortable with your new wallet. And then you realize that you've almost forgotten you ever had your old wallet. Sure, you still remember most of the stuff you lost on that wallet. But then again, you don't remember the feeling of hurt that you felt when you lost it. That's because that wallet you lost is no longer your wallet. You're no longer holding on. This new wallet you're holding, it has all the important cards and pictures and stuff that you need. This is your wallet. And this time, you tell yourself, you're never losing this one. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Les hommes oublient, mais ne pardonnent jamais; Les femmes pardonnent, mais n'oublient jamais. Men forget, but never forgive; Women forgive, but never forget. - at 1:40 PM wishy washy.... woohoo, went to east coast park with TN0403A (my classmates.. RP) yesterday. meet banana (juliana bey) at kovan mrt at 1pm.. had our lunch at BK dan we went to cold storage to grad those chips and drinks.. can u believe it, $27 for those rubbish...lol.. prawn cracker, callabe, lays, two packet of twisties, dorito's, two bottles of sparkles (apple and grape), one bottle of mineral water... i think dat's abt it.. while walking to the bus interchange, we bought two packet of durians.. YUMMY!!! lol.. meet mama at her house's bus stop.. dan headed down to east coast.. saw mel and siti on our way... etc... meet the rest at mac... went to pitch the tent and unpack our stuff... played some spastic games.. though quite fun.. haha... the forefit was like DUH!!! ... anyway, there was soooooooooooooooooooooo much food!!! we ate till we were quite contented..lol.. still, there were leftovers.. dim sim(pau, siu mai, spring rolls, fried-dunno-wad-wrap-in-wad) chips, friuts (durians and grapes), bee hoon, fried rice, jellys, sandwiches, drinks... aiyo, cant remember... think dats abt it.. FULL! at ard 7, banana, han feng, jie shang, juliana yeo, xin yi and ME rented bikes.... sad to say, han feng injured himself!!! he was cycling ON THE CORRECT LANE and dat idiotic little gal was ON THE WRONG LANE.. well, it wasn't really dat gal's fault coz it was kinda squeezie... anyway, they collide.. the next thing i noe was, the gal was crying... and han feng's bike was on top of him! anyway, we helped the gal up and her idiotic parents brought her to the pavement... hanfeng injured his hip while trying a avoid the gal... but too bad, cant siam her.. walaoeh he was in pain lor... wadeva, after he got up he went to check if dat gal was alright.. politely he asked the dad and guess wot dat fucking dad say.."she is ok, just make up ur fucking idea when you are driving"... oh pls, we were cycling... and pls la, you scolded the word fuck in front of ur own daughter... have you got any manners... wad a father.. pls teach ur daughter lah.. no sense of direction... wad kind of dad u r man... anyway, hanfeng went to change the bike coz the brake was kinda loose?? i dunno... cycled to the jetty took some pics etc.. returned the bike and went back to our 'territory' tried to finish up the food but no luck.. lol.. we were all filled to the brim.. wanna puke! lol... played fire crackers etc.. some of us were sitting at the beach.. enjoying the night breeze.. so cool.. how nice... planes and many plane.. too bad it wasn't really dark... not many stars.. lol.. unlike my blog.. full of stars.. big dipper.. lol.. diper.. hahahahaha.. pack up at ard 10.. xin yi's dad drove some of us to kallang mrt.. reached home at ard 11:30pm.... - at 2:46 PM 
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